Willful NO or good reason NO

This will be the parenting learning curve of the week.  When is my girl giving a normal 4 year old willful declaration of independence and when does she have a good reason?

We had been advised to let her dress in familiar, orphanage smell clothes, so we have alternated days.  When I went to put orphanage pants on her, and I was looking for a shirt because the matching shirt seemed too hot (Our spring seems desperately cold to people in Haiti.), she hugged me with absolute delight when the matching, familiar shirt was finally put on.

Last night brushing Mica’s teeth, a task she does not like, but she definitely needs, one spot in her mouth started bleeding.  Ok, what I was sure was a willful no was a good reason no.

I’ll be sorting this out for a while.


3 thoughts on “Willful NO or good reason NO

  1. ellen, I think some of this is a lifetime of learning. What is adoption/trauma related, what is just normal, age appropriate acting out? Even with Amara I question these things at times, and I know that having an older child come home will bring those questions out times 1000. It will be an interesting ride 🙂 I like the tip to let her wear her familiar orphanage clothes… I hadn’t heard that before, but it is a good idea. Thanks for sharing.


  2. That was a dilemma to me even without the cultural/adoptive complications. Will be praying for discernmaent for y’all.


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